Today is so not my day.

Went to work earlier coz my uncle needs to go somewhere else, so off I went, with my cousin.

It was raining cats and dogs early in the morning, but luckily the rain stop before I left my house, my day seems to have started good, and it will be a good day today… or so I thought.

I hang my fox jacket on my bag like any other normal day, walking and talking to my cousin on the road to Mrt station. My jacket dropped halfway without me noticing… just when I notice something went missing, I heard three construction workers shouting at me from the back coz they saw me drop my jacket… Such kind people…

It was too late though, my jacket was on the wet and dirty road, well you can imagine.. construction site, rain, road. Need I say more? I ran over with my heels, well short heels, to pick up my jacket. The rain water got onto the velvet layer of my shoes and soaked the whole patch of it under my toes… I didn’t notice until when I picked up my jacket and tried to clean it with wet tissue… good thing that I always have wet tissues with me. My jacket…. My foot… my shoes… new shoes new jacket somemore… =~~~

I was so sad already, and you think it ends here…. I couldn’t sleep last night coz I slept whole noon yesterday, and it’s effect kicks in, in the middle of the day. I was tired, but I skipped coffee coz I was already having a bad tummy ache… I had to buy bao zhai wan after shitting liquid 2 or 3 times… and all these times… I farted so much and so loudly it’s obvious everyone who is in the toilet had heard it… it was chains of loud farts…. I feel so pai seh when I come out of the cubicle… This went on for the whole day…

Sales wasn’t that good today as expected of every Tuesday… so I took some pictures of the shop,

well, for people who are curious ba…

Nothing happened today… really nothing… just made my this particular off day a sleeping day because of the rain… I initially had wanted to go for a swim and do some sun tanning while reading my dummy book, but u know, it had to rain… big time.. very zhun timing somemore… It was like…

--->*blink blink* waking up mode…

Looks outside the window…. And thinks….

“Hhmm like not sunny enough ler….”

Heard the rain starts to fall heavily out of no where

…

… …

Maybe I should just make this my sleeping day….< ---

Well I often have days where I decide to just sleep it off… very often last time when I wasn’t working at all… but it’s been a while since I have done that… so I thought maybe I should… I just sleep and sleep, even if I wake up, I will just go back to sleep… just sleep… but halfway through like during dinner time, I can’t take it anymore… I felt like I am going to die if I continue sleeping… so I woke up and read 2 materials….

1 – my Mandarin translated manga kekkaishi

2 – my dummy book on wine

The words on the manga are hard to read I tell you, it took me hours to read one volume and yet I couldn’t really figure out totally what is going on in the volume… I only had a general idea of the progress since I kept skipping words, nevertheless, it’s much better then reading chinese subtitle from animation since I have to pause it many many times…

My dummy book not only serve me as my knowledge book, it serve the purpose as my eye soother as well… after reading chinese text for so long.. english text is so much much more better….

Other than that, yeah eat sleep eat read… oh yeah blog… that’s about all.. btw, I ate 3 meals today…. Oh god… the fats….

Just like any other customers will, they came into the shop asking things about wines, although the first look at them gave my cousin and I a spine tingling feeling, they are after all customers and I try not to judge by looks…… they seems to be very interested in wine for the first 5 minutes… just talking about wine and wine and wine, (well it’s a wine shop)…and then they strike…

- 5 minutes

Although ‘unsafe to females’ looking people… but yay!! Another possible sale… just be careful…

First they made praises about you for no apparent reason. That is when you know that whatever it is, something is not right… Wasn’t anything about casual “you are so nice” comment but how you look how your character is like and etc etc which of coz you know is untrue… since I believe no one can look at you for five minutes and have so many good things to say about you unless they are up to something.

-5 minutes

What the hell are with this two guys..…. Think you’re the one who says the nicest things about me liao. In my whole people tell me that my eyes are freaking small, you tell me my eyes are beautiful… stupid suspicious looking perverted old man… stop this crap and just show me your tail…

Second they tried to be your ‘friend’ coz of the above reasons they gave you and ask for your name card, and then your name… when they found out that the general shop name card do not give them your personal phone number other then the shop’s number, they asked for your personal number. After refusing to give them, they converse with each other for the purpose of letting you hear their conversation and thought that you would feel the slightest guiltiness eg.” She very nice ler.. will be a nice girlfriend etc” the other one replied “but she don’t want to be our friend ler. So wasted” and then tried many, many ways to ask you out for a drink… ‘wine’..Even after I said I don’t do things like going out just like that with people I met for the first time. I think they even attempted to get my 16 years old cousin involved in this saying things like she could drink as well etc…-_- after being rejected by me again and again while still half entertaining them, they step down to meals… to tea break.. to etc… to nearby place…even up to the extent of buying a bottle of wine and drink here straight away, and even made rude comments like “don’t stay here so long la.. not good”

- 10 minutes

Oh man, intrusive old man… not only perverted looking but they act like one too, this is a wine shop, not a whore house…even tried to get my cousin involved ? omg she is only sixteen for god’s sake…leave her alone u sick old man… enough already, how many times exactly do you want my rejection to be made known… haven’t I repeat it again and again already? Don’t stay here? Going with you is worse and worst! Omg, I am not even hinting anymore, they are still persisting… isn’t my answer straight enough? Can I kill this 2 perverts… I think my murder sense are coming up…the only good thing is my cousin is smart enough to siam after i manage to get her out of the mess.

Third they start to talk about the things they do which by then finally revealed what they are really up to… talk about the things they sell etc etc… after I asked them straight they finally revealed they are doing network marketing. I gave them multiple obvious hints.. k la, not exactly hints since I said “sorry I am not interested” many, many times although still smiling.. even telling them that they are not suppose to do this when they mention bringing their products in to show me. Still continue asking me out for a drink etc, and said the “we will come by again.”

- 10-15 minutes

Oh so it’s you again bloody network marketer.. finally made you objective known… and still I told you I am not interested.. not in you, as well as your products… which part of I am not interested do you not understand? Which part of I am only interested in wines do you not understand… even repeating it won’t make you stop? Yeah sure, you look so much better with your products after consuming it… you already look like a pervert now, I wonder how you look like when you’re in your ‘prime’ time. Omg *imaginary puking* *breathless, brain-dead, murder instinct rising, tolerating everything by pinching their name card between my index and thumb really really hard all the while…

After the whole thing is over and as they step out of the shop FINALLY! My plastic smile seems to have frozen in anger… with that retarded by aliens face of mine, I walked over to my cousin and scratch her arms as I hear them walking further and further away…I had to finish my bottle of coffee and continue with my bottle of mineral water before my plastic smile melted away.

These are what some of the Singapore representatives of NutriLite company would do to promote their products and pull you into network marketing.

It’s been a day of laughter today… I started work earlier than usual, but today was a good day. I manage to do sales naturally and 3 of us (my uncle me and my cousin) talk about a lot of past experiences and laugh our asses off… not one quarter hour passed without laughter.

He opened a bottle of rose wine today and tried it for the first time. It was my 2^nd time drinking but I prefer the 1^st one coz it taste a little raisin-ny. Anyway, this time it taste like… fruit punch… smells like … perfume… very drinkable..

One more thing is that, I found out from yesterday’s wine tasting that… I don’t really like Sauvignon Blanc… grapefruit smells like it taste like it… a little honey texture but… it’s not the pure grapefruit type taste.. more of something which has the bitterness of the skin included…. Definitely not my favorite.

Tomorrow I probably have the chance to try ice wine. Once again, but well… why not? Lol…

Anyway, on my way home… I passed by this lorry… which had the side mirror’s back decorated….

Thoughtful owner I would say, but he needs an art lesson…

Went out the whole of yesterday with Viki. Quite a good day I would say, we got what we wanted. I manage to buy my esprit wallet… the dark brown one without carvings if Blackie and Pam is wondering which one. A pair of.. erm.. shoes… with a tiny lil but if heel. And erm… shirts for my moo…

But the best thing if all is, I am able to see a whole day of Cass.. what he does.. etc… it’s fun and tiring both at the same time. Fun when he smiles at you etc etc… fun when he is on the verge of crying and how u just need to carry him up in the air, it took him just 1 second to change that =( to a =D. Fun when u do something which is so unamusing to anyone else but is so amusing to him… he can laugh at the same thing I did for fifty times without getting bored… it didn’t work at the end of the day though when he need some food and some sleep and some food and some sleep and some food and some sleep coz I think that is the only 2 thinks he really need right now other then the basic life sustaining oxygen and tremendous amount of attention. He is quite an attention seeker, probably like other babies, but I didn’t quite remember having any impression of my cousins being an attention seeker when I was young.. really young… maybe because I was young too then and got every amount of energy in the world to play with that… so I didn’t feel it.

I remember I didn’t think of my cousin’s as babies when I was young although yes I call them babies as a term… but I was really thinking of tiny humans that will never grow up to be as huge as myself… and they will forever go gigiagagagogugugu when they speak, and I will have this imaginary lines that I thought they meant… and I will reply gegeuaugeoegoa which is the answer that I have translated for them to their understanding, and they will smile like they understand what I said when I didn’t know myself… now I realize all those stupid sounds which I thought was baby language when I was young, are just sounds which babies find new and amusing because sounds have different syllabus. Their smile didn’t mean they understand… it means that they are just amused… but u know what? I can’t really figure out how my baby language talks can go on for a long period of time before my cousin learns language. How did they manage to keep up with all my rubbish talking.

There are times when I talk to Cass knowing that he won’t understand but pretending that he understand but still knowing he don’t understand.. and Viki told me he actually understand some of the things I do, don’t think he is still the blur blur baby. I was kind of amused… I was wondering which part of the process of me making fun of him did he understand when his mum was in the fitting room.

Anyway I did something I realize is stupid when I was at TCC with them. I spread my hands and said “hi-fi~” and expect him to already know what to do, when he just smile at me clueless I decided to just take his little hand and five me…his hand slap only about ¼ of my palm. Aaawwww the cuteness of it.

And when Viki show her anger on Cass, and I decided to hug him a little and see what positive effect it has on him when someone shows care when he is sad… you know what… he did something really really really cute… he just put his face on my chest and rub his head all around and look at me with a puppyish eyes once every few rub… That moment I thought he is the cutest little thing in the world but his mum told me he is just acting ke lian… well to gain people’s “aaawww-ness” but isn’t that what babies do? Lol

I realize something though, I wasn’t sure if it was because of the occasionally lifting up and down, or escalating in the shops… but the things that Cass do was only for a short period of time each…

Drinks milk sleep wake up blur mood happy mood bad mood drinks milk sleep wake up blur mood happy mood bad mood. This routine just goes round and round like a cycle, but each of them doesn’t last long. It’s quite amusing to see it happening like that for a day…. The downside is that I spent more than I expected yesterday, so I have to save save save again... pray that I have the will power to do that or if not I am going to get into very very very into trouble…

I woke up today with aches here and there on my whole body… ouch… I haven’t been doing exercise for so long and I carried his pram up and down the stairs along with Viki, I threw him up the air many times when he is on the verge of crying, but most of the time is just for the fun of seeing him =I =D =I =D =I =D =I =D

I couldn’t really get myself to wake up today coz of the pain… I was wondering that it is gonna be a pain having to wake up with muscle aches everyday… probably what Viki is going through lol… ouch..

So anyway, got up today and work. I haven’t finish the wine on dummies, but another book was intro-ed to me by a customer although my uncle didn’t really think the book help much… I am sticking with my wine for dummies for now coz it’s light and interesting to read.. very absorbable as well…

So far I have found.

$350 seems to be the cheapest I could find outside. Well $50 more ex then what I have expected. It seems living at moo’s place became the no do option as I didn’t have the ‘face’ to make someone they kind of know, move out.

Waiting for replies from an agent to see if they can find an appropriate room for me coz the cheapest rooms I could find is still from agents.. >.> I asked how is the procedure like, but they seems reluctant to tell me on the phone. I wanted to know the extra cost involved etc… geez…

Either way, other agents gave me the cheapest at $400, I know it’s only $50 dollar diff la, but I think I becoming a bit niao now…

There is an option for 1+1 unit going at 950, if me and my sis sharing.. well we still need our own personal space so having 2 person is one room is kind of cramp.. 1+1 means one room one living room, more or less like a studio I think… not a good idea at all.

Anyway, if any of you happen to know like friend’s friend or relative or whatsoever.. neighbor or wat.. renting their room at $200-$300, do let me know… Include PUB, no air con… furnished or not doesn’t really matter… smoke or non also nvm. Internet is important, location doesn’t really matter as long as it is not one of those inaccessible place… need to have car etc one.. u know u know.. best is near mrt..

As for my sis. Air con is important… but of coz she is willing to pay more, $300-$400

Just call or email me ba

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Anyways… it really feels like winter lately… for no reason my goosebumps shows up and etc.. the wind is big I feel like winter, had to go to the tap to warm up my hands once a while during work. At home I just recycle my yawn to warm my hands up. Other than working, all I’ve been doing is data entry, do moo’s sch work for him -_-, searching for rooms, and reading wine for dummies… oh the book is so interesting, I guess it’s really for dummies after all. But u know wad, it’s been a long time since I was last interested in a book… The last time I bought a book was in Melbourne from borders, coz I was amaze by how they can actually draw a penis on the book cover. The book was full of rubbish though, and was written by a man who thinks of penis as a god or some sort. And it cost about $32 aus if I didn’t remember wrongly…

Change of topic

Seasons and festivals are coming.. Christmas, new year, Chinese new year.. but I feel like these occasions of yesteryear just happened last month or something… but in between a lot of things happen.. I couldn’t catch up… been a slow poke from since I don’t know when and then oh this is happening, and this is happening too, don forget, that too and this.. most of it which I was either ask to shut up about or I don’t feel like saying myself. Most of them are choices that comes with a whole full package of stories.

I want to be a full time at the wine shop, 1^st I am not bored sitting at shop all day, unlike fashion store, 2^nd there are so many things to know.. it’s not dead.. basically I think I am interested la that’s y. 3^rd, I need a full time job for the $$. Let’s be practical a bit la, if I was given $700 for a full time job I won’t do it even if I am interested in it basically coz I can’t survive.. unless u know.. I am filthy rich… then I can do the things I am interested in without having it in a form of a job.

But I still wasn’t able to talk to my uncle about it. Although there are so many to learn.. yeah la, slowly I am absorbing this and that. But I still don’t feel I have enough qualities to ask for full time job from him. Besides his shop haven’t been long and blah blah ( some other things I’ve considered ) It’s holding my question back….besides, although he repeatedly tell me that he didn’t know much as well, he didn’t exactly say I done my job well enough before… well…. I think I might be worrying too much. But I don’t want to risk it… and I don’t want him to employ me full time based solely on kinship coz u never know what will happen in the future… too much variables.

Or just go back to taking 2 part time jobs.. 7 days a week again… simpler choice… oh man…

I really have mixed feelings about how things are lately.. So far in my life.. I dare say… although I am have a few difficulties here and there… not big.. just what people have in their everyday life.. occasional things that makes me feel lost etc… financial emotions etc etc etc la… but I’ve always been given a solution by luck. I am considered a lucky girl ba, although I don’t believe so much in lottery, maybe something like practically lucky. Like when I need $.. suddenly I find my forgotten bank book at a corner of my room.. sometimes at my secret compartment of drawer.. sometimes people who owes me $ for a long time suddenly pop up to return the $, sometimes when I am upset, I am suddenly introduced new things to have fun with. Or suddenly so busy in a good way (friends birthday, occasions etc) to keep me from thinking of them… or sometimes in a situation where there is no way out, I will accidentally break the wall and bump myself out. Sometimes it feels like someone I can’t see is watching me and maybe gave a little bit of help here and there, usually even before the solution come out, I have the hunch it will, and I began to rely on it. But lately my mixed feelings doesn’t include these feelings of reliance, it suddenly disappeared. I wonder what I did to make it go…

The one and only good news I think I have is probably, I’ve cut down on my smoking a hell lot…. To 1/3 the amount… hopefully it continues… So many all these things happen in exchange for me to have better health? Haha… -_- lame…

Anyway… that is that for now ba… back to my data entry… or I make my job sound a bit better… back to my inventory system design. Lol….fark I can still laugh…

My work place @ The Central ( Clarke Quay MRT )

World of Wines #B1-51

Can come by and take a look. Hur hur, although I can’t garuntee any possible discounts coz my uncle is rather strict about that. But I can give him the puppyish pair of punchable eyes and try?

Someone ask me to look out for the following… so if any of you have any lobangs. Please let me know, thankx

near bus or train...

gals only..

no smoker...

all bills included, (mayb except phone bills)

Air-Con

Common room

Optional – if got maid to cook for her better…

Optional – preferably without contract

$300-$400/m

I have to say, my uncle have such patience, it really lead me to feeling guilty easily. So far, even though I have done well.. not so much but a few small ones here and there, not bad mistake, just careless. And a big one which any other boss would have machine gunned me with their merciless mouth without a doubt, my uncle didn’t. So far he have been treating me nice, or maybe it is just his believes ba, but I believe there is a limit to everything, not that I am trying to test or poke him in anyway, but I wonder where is his.

For his courtesy, I decide to help him a little by bringing home so work to do, it’s another way to thank him for not going gaga at me making some stupid mistake which might have caused him trouble. He let me bring home a bottle of wine to test again today, although its Cabernet Sauv again, but it’s erm… Australian instead of Chilean. It still has the cardboard smell, although light, it’s not as fading as the last one. Actually, I don’t really know how to describe. Using my best description to well.. describe it and oh, it’s a little hhmm after you pop a vicks into your mouth, and it melts away, then there is still a little tingling feel coming out of your throat. Yeah that is the taste. Tat tingling feeling. This time the taste didn’t run away after leaving the wine out for 10 mins. The taste is still there which is good, compared to the small bottle ones we drank on our first day.. this is slightly stronger.

At least the above is what I am gonna tell my uncle about the differences I can detect.

Ok stop the wine talk. Start the food talk. I think so far after working in the wine shop. When I eat in their kopitiam, I have only tried 2 type of meals there, one Korean, one Jappy. I especially like the Korean mix rice dish. It’s something like a Korean version of nasi rojak. I love it to the end. It comes with a small amount of standard kimchi and a bowl of soup, fills me up to the brim. I manage to remember taking a photo of it. Yum… With the drink, this meal cost me $6.50

I specially like the egg yolk coz it’s half boiled. Although I’ve tried to cook half boiled egg before, but the yolk mostly get more cooked then what I wanted, or.. well.. the white is still mostly transparent. The yolk itself taste like the way my mum cook half boiled eggs. Somehow or rather I start to miss it after the 1^st time I had the Korean meal.

Anniiwaaeee So these are basically what I’ve been doing ba lately. Other than these, the only thing that have changed is my diet. No more olive oil with bread, coz my bread expired. Always forget to buy when I return home. And and… been eating fried rice at 12 am these 2 days.. and and.. my reduced kgs miss me so much they chose to come back to me =~~~

Just when I finished my last post, I think someone up there is making fun of me and laughing at me. A secure future was offered to me at the cost of my believes and pride. I didn’t think pride was that much of an issues although I often use this terms to describe what I feel, I think it is more of my believes that I couldn’t let go. I was tempted for a mere 2 seconds, felt insulted, and then angry.

Neeeway.

Let’s talk about something happy. Let’s talk about food. ^.^

I have been eating bread and olive oil before I start work, but since I started work, I had to eat outside, I couldn’t possibly make a bento due to me laziness. So I ate at the food court. It’s a waste that I forgot to take a good picture of today’s meal as it was quite pretty, but I took picture for yesterdays.

It was at a ramen restaurant with a woody furniture. Almost like those you see in anime, small, cozy, very jap coz people working there are jap. Even ordering food wasn’t done verbally. It was something like….

1^st step :
Take the menu, look at the pictures… chose spicy or non spicy.

2^nd step :
Move your view slightly to the right, see a list of toppings, each of them cost $, chose.

3^rd step :
Chose whatever side dish you want.

4^th step :
Wave your hand and wait.

5^th step :
Points to your lunch partner, point spicy or non spicy, point toppings. Point myself, point spicy or non, point toppings. Point all the side dish you want. Cost $ each too of coz.

6^th step :
Nod head and make ok sign with question mark face.

7^th step :
Repeat step 5 to confirm order.

Don't freak out on the amount of spring onions. I thought the ramen was plain noodle and soup coz they let us chose the toppings, so I asked for more spring onions and char siew. In the end I couldn't finish the char siew.

I have to say, although ordering food was a bit of a hassle, the ramen there was traditional. I forgot the name of the place but it is easily noticeable because of the unique set up, the location is L shape from Waraku if you know what I mean. Central Clarke quay 3^rd floor.

Yesterday my uncle opened a bottle of Zinfandel from US. Both my cousin and me tried a glassful and hhmm what can I say, the most prominent of it all is the spiciness. A mild sweetness is detected behind the spiciness although I couldn’t really figure out what is the smell, probably due to my flu. Work thus far have been quite lenient other then the occasional guilt of unable to absorb so much information in such a short time. Then again, I aint a super woman. It does affect my job a hell lot due to my product knowledge. As far as retail goes, a certain amount of confidence is needed to bring yourself out there. I couldn’t really do that till now coz my product knowledge is almost none. I am working on it though, so yeah…

There isn’t any wine sampling today, a little bit disappointed as I was really looking forward to it. We’re quite pre-occupied though, so I guess we didn’t have much choice. Not that business is so good, more of pounding information to my rusty brain, I guess I kind of tire my uncle out as well, not that he show any signs but you know, teaching someone can be very tiring.

I was planning to make a list of products in my computer so I can remember them better. At least when I type out myself, I am able to remember them easier. I got to do this during my own personal time but I guess it’s ok since I am curious myself and I haven’t really feel like I am working during my time in the shop. It’s more like free lesson to be able to work in a wine shop; I am more than thankful already. Not only the free lessons, the working environment couldn’t be better. A good boss thus far, although I think he sees me as a 100% niece instead of an employee. Ok la, maybe 90% niece 10% employee, coz really, I don’t think there is a boss out there who will be so kind to their staff. Unless you know… he is exceptional. Then again, it’s been only 4 days who knows what will happen next time eh?

Although I want to take full time, but I guess I will only do that after I am satisfied with the amount of product knowledge I have. So in the mean time, I will just look at the possibility of another part time job to stand in ASAP. Been a little tight on my purse lately, I really need to do some serious control over my $ else I would end up eating the west north wind. *sigh* Not to mention the amount of $ I will need for the near future. Looking at my future, I really see nothing, or if there is anything, it would be the bare vast desert that is about to eat me up. Sometimes I wonder if there is a point in living like this, or even just living itself. I know how I sound, really, but I can’t help feeling this way. I hope $ will just fall from the sky.

Lets skip the pain in the ass thoughts and talk about what I dream last time… I dreamt I was a pro violinist and broke one of the string during one of my play. My music before the string actually broke, had some kind of magical power that could lead anyone to do as I wish. I can’t remember the details, but anyway, I was thinking now that if I really have such power, the first person I would want to control is probably my dad. Control how he thinks… then second, I will make a rich evil man that is really filthy rich and super evil, the (buy fierce kill human kind)-direct translate to Chinese-, transfer all his $$ to me and then stay sickly forever… and forget that he ever had the $$ he transferred to me. I hope the amount is 10million if not I will target more filthy rich super evil man. I have plans for all the 10 million already. Yes I know it’s imaginary $ but you know, I have the right to plan imaginary possibilities since it’s my own. 2million to keep in bank for the purpose of laying eggs, 2 million to buy a house in aussie, 1 3 million to buy 2 more houses for *secret* in Singapore. 1 million to furnish my house in the laziest manner. *whatever it is that can make my daily life more convenient then ever can be* The rest throw in bank. The interest can probably let me survive the rest of my life of coz without luxury. I don’t ask for much though.

*sigh* comparing my daydream fantasy and reality future, worlds apart.

Anyway my deer friends. An announcement I have to make before I end my blogging here in this very lonely night.

I am broke, so big chance I won’t be able to go out unless it’s window shopping and cheap meals. Job changing always like that, especially when I am working different part time altogether. So yeah, anything expensive, just skip me.

Went to Viki’s place on Tuesday, first time I really hug Cass, aaaww he is damn cute la… the kind if cuteness he have before I tried hugging him and after I tried, is kind of different.. maybe because I feel a little closer to him once I hug him.

Viki intro-ed me an anime named kekkaishi. Not bad I would say, although she say it’s like bleach. I think it’s got a taste of its own.

So today marks my first day of working in the wine shop. I don’t know it’s because he is my uncle or because that’s the way he works. I feel relax in the shop, I don’t exactly feel like I am working, I ended up feeling quite guilty because of that. Of coz I am letting myself have some time to absorb the information and all… but really, I think he is treating us as nieces more than workers… (by nieces I mean my another cousin who is trying out working life after her O) Well, at least this is the most relax job thus far after working with diff bosses… Letting us go home earlier makes me feel all the more guilty.

Aniwaaeeee

He let us try 2 wines, since I am sure most of my friends aren’t really familiar with wine just like me, let’s talk a little bit about it here. Next time you can try it out yourself in restaurant or buy one home to try.

As many knows, there are red and white wine. Today I am introducing one of each I’ve tried in the store.

Chardonnay – White wine

Cabernet Sauvignon – Red wine

The first thing I notice after some swirling of Chardonnay would be the prominent apple smell. My uncle chose a cheaper range as it is simply for sampling, thus the smell didn’t last long, but he seems to be able to smell melon within the Chardonnay. The taste is slightly different though, not exactly appleish . Definitely sweet, after leaving it out for long though, the apple taste bland away. It was explained that because it’s a cheaper range. Oh well, but before the wine bland out totally, the apple fruit smell changes along the way… I can’t really tell what fruit they are but … it feels kind of magical.

Cabernet Sauvignon on the other hand, doesn’t exactly smell fruity, on the first smell, I couldn’t make out what it is, it feels familiar, not wood, not socks, definitely not fruit, not grass… somewhere near wood.. somewhere near paper… After smelling and drinking it for a while, I realize it is the smell of cardboard. The good thing about this red wine is that it won’t dries up your tongue in a snap. It is rather smooth, but the cardboard smell is mysterious. I’ve never really tried tasting wine like that before, although I always am able to pick out which one I prefer after tasting, I never really took my time. Quite a new experience so far, and enjoying it.

On the whole I miss out something important though, I guess I was too surprise by the smell of the wine, very curious and feels like I found a new toy… I was too engross with the smell I forgot to really taste the wine properly… ouch… I can’t really help it though, my nose suddenly became very, very curious after smelling something mysterious.

The slightly better news -

After eating bread with whatever kind of pate and olive oil for almost every meal this few days, I have lost one thousand grams, it is sort of encouraging. Hopefully I will reach the target soon. Will be reducing the amount of bread per meal slowly…

Finally got the bag and other things thing I ordered. Although not very accurate coz it seems that they’re out of stock ( although they claimed the things I’ve ordered are pre-order that’s why the delay) and refunded me the $$.

I didn’t get the bag I ordered. Luckily for Viki, her bag is available. I am not gonna buy from online spree again ever. Coz the $ saved is not worth the waiting time… So far, the only online purchase that I’ve continue making is from E-Bay.

I have removed half of my last post due to some unexpected/unknown/hidden objections from the writer of the previous interesting topic, but I think I will still keep the link available since I don’t think she mind a link to her blog after all.

Okies…. So lately there have some incident that upsets me here and there, maybe a little disappointed or somehow made me feel a little out of confidence because of the uncertainty of my future. The desert land that I see when I look into my future worries me. Also knowing how others view me as which I haven’t realize.

Well, I had expected that people around me be straight forward to me. Maybe not TAT straight forward to the extent that you have to tell my how ugly my lips look or things like I am fat, but you know, the basic things of likes and dislikes, what you can tolerate and what not. Coz after all, I don’t see the point in hiding all these feelings unless it’s for a better course or maybe if you can see something good coming out of it. I was kind of wrong though, it had occurred to me that not everyone see it that way. Looking back at a few incidents or events that I’ve been through in the past. I realize that there is somewhat quite a number of times that people didn’t mean what they say to me, even when they say it with a smiling face.

Take for example. I seldom borrow $ from people even though if I have financial difficulties sometimes. I just didn’t want to borrow, I thought money is quite a sensitive issue to everyone. Apparently it is although sometimes people claimed its not. I did a few times before throughout my life though, when I really couldn’t handle it. Anyway, most people would have this kind of experience by now, when you borrow $ from people, they always say “don’t need la” when you try to return. With a smiling face assuring how it doesn’t matter to them and if you do calculate so much about $, means you’re not treating them as friend. Ever wonder what they’re really thinking inside their heart? I am not gonna generalize everyone to this standard but yeah, just thought that things aren’t as simple sometimes.

Or some that talk and laughs with you letting you feel you’re their best friend ever, or they are your best friend ever, but sneer at you in their heart feeding some sense of superiority potion to themselves and feeling satisfied.

Of coz I do know that everyone has their dose white lies coz they don’t want to hurt people etc etc… I think that’s fine, as long as what you do is not out to hurt people or putting people down. Everyone has their likes and dislike about each other too, that is fine too. As long as you don’t pretend to like it unless he or she gonna feel terribly hurt, upset, depressed or somewhere along the line where they feel there is no one left in the world to understand or share the same dreams with them then start to have suicidal thoughts. Other than that, I think it’s advisable to tell the truth.

I see things quite simply for those of you who still knows by now. If you show me a sad face, I gonna think you are sad. If you show me a happy face, I gonna think you're happy. If you're excited about something I mentioned, I believe you have the same interest as me. If you're give me a can't be bothered look when I talk about something, I stop talking about it unless it is really, really, important. If you don't seems to mind what I am doing, I continue doing it. If you seems to mind what I am doing, I will stop doing it unless it betrays my basic principal. If you tell me not to return the $ I will happily keep it after a few tries. If you want me to return the $, I return it as soon as I am able to. If you think I can tolerate certain things, do it by all means. If you think I can't tolerate certain things, ask me first. One thing I totally dislike is for people to test me. Test if I am smart of stupid, test if I get the hint. Test if I am able to read between the lines. Test if I am such and such. Just ask me directly or tell me directly la... very hard mer... isn't it very tiring to test all year round.

One thing you can be sure of is I hate reading in between the lines. When it comes to hint, let me tell you all now la, so far I've been always seeing things on the greener side. If you tell me not to return you the $, I will just think you're a generous person, I won't think of it as a test. If you tell me that I should not do this, give me a valid reason if I haven't seen it, I would stop doing it if I see your point. No point condemning when you chose not to voice out. I don't think I need to emphasize anymore of this. I am hint proof. I don't get hints, knock this right in.

So far, I believed I have been quite simple. Other then occasional avoiding of hurting people white lie, and a little mischief lie to get me where I want to be but most of the time own up afterwards and ask for forgiveness if I remember I lied.

Today, I was caught up in a situation, I wasn’t able to lie. Lately, it has been a lot of thinking about what happen next. What is next. What to do next, and although thinking about what is my future gonna be like have been something in my mind all the while, worrying about it to this extend I am now, is something that never happens before in my life. During the short unofficial interview my uncle give me coz I wanted to work in the wine shop. He asked me a question which I have been wondering for so long but never found and answer. Usually for an interview, I would avoid telling things I know they don’t want to hear and adding a little bit of spice I think they might want to hear. This time round, I was stunt and the answer was so obvious in front of me coz I see a huge, vast desert in front of me (mental image la) I couldn’t find the words to avoid or find the words to make up so I had to tell him the truth. My ans is “thought about it, but I have no answer..”

I was upset that I gave that answer coz I know it’s the truth. All I ever thought of was work for $ work for $, although I did think of what interest I have here and there, but those thoughts wasn’t motivating or whatsoever. Not that I think anything is wrong with working for $ and getting on with life. When asked this question though, I feel incapable. Coz I know this kind of answer leads to making people feel you’re empty. It’s not totally bad though, I am glad I was able to be truthful about this although this time I was kind of forced into. Just that the lack of confidence I already have, dug deeper into my heart.

So anyway, the good news is, I requested for part time coz I need time to absorb new things into my life as well. Going to the shop everyday to learn new things won’t allow myself anytime to absorb. So… I am starting work in the wine shop on Friday. Hopefully this time, I can find something that I am interested in, and stick on with it, or around it.

For now, let me meditate in silence so I can shift all those negative thoughts inside me towards elsewhere before I begin the journey I seek.

U know what? I am officially jobless again. My contract has ended, and even though I really feel like working at the wine shop. My knowledge about wine is just so tiny, I wouldn’t even regard it as knowledge. I feel a lack of confidence stepping into the wine shop wanting to work there.

Yeah, although it’s my uncle’s shop blah blah, but I still feel I need to know more before trying out. Whatever info I get from the net doesn’t seems to be enough.

Moo on the other hand, intro-ed me another part time job while I find ways to study more about wines.

Now that I am considered jobless, I feel a bit awkward. Although I can sleep in and do things that I don’t normally do, whatever it is gonna be. I still feel weird. Probably knowing that if I don’t find a job soon, I gonna be in some sort of financial trouble. Sometimes I feel like going back to study, but nothing much really interest me, on top of it, I hate long term studying. I wished I am a much more curious person so I can really venture into things and finding what I truly like, not just preference. It’s a pain to feel stale about everything to do with getting on with life, sometimes I wonder what is things like without my existent. Putting all these rubbish aside.

There is another job that I could try out since the person hiring didn’t mind my education level. It was a teaching job at tution center. I had always wanted to be a teacher or childcare or some sort. But well, my education level didn’t allow me.

I am kind of stuck, working in a wine shop is something interesting, a lot to venture into. Surely won’t get bored of it in a snap. Teaching, I have no experience or whatso ever, but it was still my hope to get job since long time ago. Game master, no future no nothing, but full time job at least. And its kind of so me…

I want the wine job, I wan the teaching job, I want the game master job. If there is anything like mon Tuesday wine shop Wednesday Thursday teaching and Friday Saturday wine shop, I would be hyped. You know what though? I must be dreaming... Not like I will surely get the job anyway.

Reading up on wines online, but didn’t manage to get much info …

Anywaaeeeiiiiii

I have this cousin who posted something no her blog which I find somewhat interesting.

http://adelineme.wordpress.com/

the post titled dark talks. Go read about it, maybe or maybe not u will freak out… don’t worry no pictures no nothing, just pure text.

Or for those who have problem clicking links…. Here you go u copy and paste for ur own convenience, how good I am.

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Blah blah balh blah main topic -:>

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